Hope

In this episode, Wendy discusses Hope and gives some tips on ways to enhance your hopes.

Wendy's novel on psychiatric hospitalizations is out on Amazon! It's called "Involuntary Hold." Check it out~ There is a plot twist you won't see coming!



International Helpline Info

 For those living outside the United States, I finally found some helpful information. The International Association for Suicide Prevention has a directory of crisis centers and helplines for over 50 countries! 

Just got to the internet and type in:

      findahelpline.com/i/iasp

 And it will bring you to a drop-down menu where you can input your country and region, and it will give you the information for your location. Granted, it doesn’t cover everywhere, but it’s a start!

** Remember if you, or a loved one, is in emotional crisis... Help is just a phone call away. Simply dial 9-8-8 for the Suicide and Crisis Hotline, or text "HOME" to 741741 to chat with someone via text 24/7 across the United States. **

Please contact us at bipolarforlife@myyahoo.com with any questions, suggestions, or comments.

Transcript

Bipolar for Life
Episode 7—Hope

Welcome to Bipolar for Life, a show dedicated to survival. This podcast examines the day-to-day struggles with this life-threatening mental illness.

 I’m your host, Wendy Foard, and I have lived with bipolar disorder for 43 years now; it hasn’t always been pretty—I’ve survived several suicide attempts, four psychiatric hospitalizations, and one disastrous trip to rehab. Yet, I’m still here to tell the tales!

 Let me say at the outset that I am NOT a medical doctor. I am simply a seasoned manic depressive, trying to help others survive this deadly condition through information and shared experiences. 

 We’ve talked through some of the heavy subjects like depression, hospitalizations, and suicide. Tonight, as we begin a New Year, I’d like to talk about something without which we could not survive… Hope. 

 Oh, don’t worry, I have some statistics for you, and we’ll break Hope down into different parts—but take a moment and ask yourself, “What do I really Hope for?” Go ahead, take that moment…

 Did your answer have to do with excelling in your job? Was your family the focus of your desires? Or perhaps the dream of personal achievement drives you. Whatever your answer, please remember that these hopes can keep you from drowning in despair… they can be a lighted buoy upon which to cling. 

 According to a recent Mood of the Nation Poll, Americans are experiencing high levels of worry and much lower levels of hope. 84% of Americans say they are extremely worried (55%), or very worried (29%), as compared to the 42% of Americans who describe themselves as extremely hopeful (18%), or very hopeful (24%). Roughly one-quarter of Americans 26% report that nothing makes them hopeful, while only 2% say that nothing makes them worried.

 So, what is Hope? I couldn’t put it into words myself, so I turned to Merriam-Webster for an official statement. According to the dictionary, Hope is a desire accompanied by an expectation of, or belief in, fulfillment. Or, to put it another way, to cherish a desire with anticipation of success. 

 Well, if that’s hope… then what is a wish? They sound like the same thing. Hope is distinguished from a wish in that hope, involves taking action towards a goal, while a wish is out of your control. For example, you hope you’ll get that promotion, while you wish you could win the lottery. 

 If hope is working towards a goal, what is a goal? Again, I turned to Merriam-Webster for the answer. The dictionary says “the end toward which effort is directed”—an aim, or a clearly directed intent or purpose.  

 So, what can we make of all this? It would seem that Hope is an intense desire that we take steps toward satisfying. If we hope we’ll live a long life, we eat healthy foods and exercise to help this hope along. But if we want to win the lottery, the best we can do is buy a ticket… and pray. I think that sums up the difference between a hope and a wish, at least according to Merriam-Webster. 

 Psychologists define Hope as “an optimistic state of mind that is based on an expectation of positive outcomes with respect to events and circumstances in one’s life, or the world at large.” Clear as mud that way, isn’t it?

 I think Barack Obama explained it very well, when he said, “Hope is that thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us if we have the courage to reach for it, and work for it, and fight for it.”

 Or perhaps Desmond Tutu’s poetic definition is more relatable, “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all the darkness.” Those of us who fight depression know all about darkness, and in order to survive it, you must have a ray of light, or a hope, to cling to; else the darkness can swallow you forever. As Dostoyevsky wrote, “To live without hope is to cease to live.”

 According to American psychologist Charles R. Snyder (1944-2006) hope is not an emotion, but rather, a skill that can be taught. While hope certainly involves our emotions, hope itself is a way of thinking, or a state of being. It reduces feelings of helplessness, increases happiness, relieves stress, and improves the quality of life. 

 Charles Snyder was a pioneer in the field of positive psychology. In fact, he wrote the first textbook on the subject. Positive psychology is the scientific study of what makes life worth living. This branch of psychology focuses on developing strengths and positive traits rather than healing traumas or diseases. 

 Charles Snyder gained international fame for his work in clinical, social and personality psychology. His theories from the 1980’s and 1990’s relate to human responses to personal feedback, the human need for uniqueness, and the motives for hope.

 According to Snyder’s studies, higher levels of hope are consistently associated with better outcomes regarding mental health, physical health, athletics, and academics.

 He cited the psychological benefits of hope as more positive emotions, a stronger sense of purpose and meaning. He also noted lower levels of depression and less loneliness. 

 Snyder also lists the physical benefits of hope as better physical health, fewer number of chronic illnesses, a lower risk of cancer, fewer sleep problems, and an overall reduced risk of all-cause mortality; or the death rate from all causes of death in a given time period. 

 Snyder’s Hope Theory proposes that hope results from an individual’s perceived ability to develop numerous and flexible pathways toward their goals. 

 According to Snyder, hope has 3 distinct parts:

1)Goals—Having a goal is the cornerstone of hope. Goals can be big or small.

2)Agency—Agency is the ability to stay motivated to meet your goal. It involves believing that good things will come from your actions, and

3)Pathways—These are the specific routes you develop to meet your goals. If the first pathway doesn’t work, you problem-solve to find a new pathway toward your goal. 

 Charles Snyder explained hope this way, “A rainbow is a prism that sends shards of multicolored light in various directions. It lifts our spirits and makes us think of what is possible. Hope is the same—a personal rainbow of the mind.”

 Over the years, many types of hope have been proposed by scholars and researchers. Some examples are:

1)Realistic Hope—Hope for an outcome that is reasonable and probable.

 2)Utopian Hope—this way of hoping is a collectively oriented hope that collaborative action can lead to a better future for all.

 3)Chosen Hope—Hope that helps us live with uncertainty and problems by choosing small goals to accomplish. 

 4)Dispositional Hope—when you are naturally inclined to a hopeful way of thinking, regardless of the situation.

 5)Transcendent Hope—or existential hope, is a hope that is not tied to a specific outcome, but a general hope that something good will happen.

 6)Situational Hope—is the hope for a specific outcome from a specific experience. For example, hoping to catch a marlin when you go deep sea fishing. 

 7)Generalized Hope—Generalized hope is a pervasive belief that most things will turn out alright in the end. When you’re optimistic most of the time, you’re experiencing generalized hope.

 8)Comparative Hope—Comparative hope comes from viewing yourself in relation to others. For instance, hoping you can run as fast as Jesse Owens.

 9)False Hope—False hope is optimism that’s not supported by reality, a hope that’s not supported by facts. 

I was going to break down the six dimensions of hope for you, but that’s just textbook information and not that useful when trying to keep your hope alive in the dark hours. So, we’re going to skip that information tonight and concentrate on how to enhance our hopes so that they may sustain us when we’re consigned to the shadows of depression. 

But before I list off a bunch of suggestions, I’d like to go over definitions again real quick as a reminder.

A Goal is having a specific objective in life.

Pathways are the different routes you take to achieve your goals.

And Agency is believing that you can drive, change, and achieve those goals.

 So, according to research, here are some things you can do to strengthen your hope:

—Write down specific, attainable goals

—Plan out several pathways to achieve each goal

—Surround yourself with supportive, positive people

—Empower your agency, or your ability to self-motivate, through positive affirmations that boost self-esteem 

—Regularly reflect on past successes to help maintain your drive toward future goals

—Cultivate stress reduction techniques

—Practice mindfulness to encourage focus

—Keep a gratitude journal to help encourage a positive state of mind and outlook on life.

These may seem very simplistic individually, but together, these suggestions will give you a firm foundation for your hopes to grow on. 

 The hope that keeps me going is that this podcast is helping someone! The thought that I could share my experience or information with someone, and have it resonate with them, makes all the effort worth it. I guess you could categorize my hope for the podcast as situational. 

I think we all have a hierarchy of hopes we live with daily. Some are more important than others, but do you know your core hopes? 

In depression, as we sink lower and lower into the darkness, the little hopes drop off one-by-one. Until, in the depths of despair, you are left with mostly misery. What hope sustains you in the total darkness? For me, it’s the hope that I will one day get to add a verse to the poem that is the human experience, through my artwork or writing. 

It is this hope that keeps me from finally cutting my wrists. The possibility that I might still have a chance to add my verse, stays my hand.  

Perhaps your core goal is to see your children graduate from college or see your business go international… whatever it is, hold on to it! That hope is what you concentrate on in the throes of depression. It is the light at the end of the tunnel, the safety net for the trapeze that is bipolar disorder, and your only hold on who you are, in the light.

 There are several methods to help you become more hopeful. Since hope is supposed to be a learned skill, perhaps putting some of these suggestions to use will help you build stronger convictions. For example:

·      Think of your goals as exciting challenges—consistently imagine how you’ll feel when you finally attain your goal.

·      Be flexible and creative—when brainstorming your pathways, develop extra plans. Have a plan B, C and D, in case Plan A doesn’t work.

·      Increase your motivation—Think of what strengths you have that you can draw on to achieve your goals.

·      Expect Roadblocks—Remember, most things of true value don’t come easily.

·      Keep going, even under stressful conditions—This will help develop your coping skills which will, in turn, help you reach your goals under pressure.

·      Take it one step at a time—If you’re struggling to reach your goals, think of one small step to take each day.

·      Turn to humor—When you’re feeling hopeless, watch a funny movie or listen to a funny podcast. A 2003 study found that laughter can increase your levels of hope. 

·      Gain strength from others—when you feel discouraged, listen to an inspiring podcast, or read a memoir of someone who has overcome overwhelming odds to increase your motivation.

“There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as the expectation of something tomorrow.”  — O.S. Marden

 That’s what I think hope is… the exciting possibilities of tomorrow. Something to look forward to, something to work and excel for. For it is the hope of something better that spurs us on to greater achievements. 

 “Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”—Helen Keller.

 I hope all this has been helpful. I know that it’s very difficult to have hope in the depths of despair, but I think we all have core hopes and dreams that keep us going. The hard part is remembering them in the darkness. This is where journaling really helps, because you can go back and remember. A gratitude journal is especially nice to reread when you are in a depressive mood. It can remember the good stuff for you!

 If all hope abandons you, please remember that there is help available… just dial 988 to talk to someone at the Suicide and Crisis Helpline. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. If you’d rather not talk, you can always text someone. Just text H-O-M-E to 741741 and chat that way, if it makes you more comfortable. 

 And remember what Samuel Smiles said, “Hope is the companion of power, the mother of success; for who so hopes strongly, has within him the gift of miracles.” 

May the miracle of hope find you!

 A miracle has found me… my book is finally published and available on Amazon! The title is Involuntary Hold and is about life on the psych ward, with a twist to make it interesting. Check it out of you get a chance! That’s Involuntary Hold on Amazon.

This is Wendy, signing off for now, and inviting you to join me next time on Bipolar for Life. If you have any comments, or suggestions, please contact me at bipolarforlife@myyahoo.com. I look forward to hearing from you. Please be safe in all your travels. Good night.